We talked about dating, relationships, confidence, rejection, marriage and, of course, we had a lot of fun with our matchmaking session. One of our favorite parts was simply watching people talk to each other. People were laughing, cheering for complete strangers, introducing themselves and making connections. Now everyone is back to regular life.
It is easy to leave a conference feeling motivated. The harder part is taking some of that energy home with you and actually doing something with it.
So, what happens next...
If You Want Marriage, You Have to Date
One statistic we shared during our presentation has really stayed with us. In the 2026 research from the Wheatley Institute and Institute for Family Studies,
86% of unmarried young adults surveyed said they expect to marry someday, but only 31% said they date at least once a month.
That's a pretty big gap between wanting marriage and actually dating. We know there are plenty of reasons for it. Dating can be expensive. People are nervous about rejection. Apps can be exhausting. Some people have had bad experiences and aren't exactly excited to put themselves out there again. But if marriage is something you really want, eventually dating has to move from something you think about to something you actually do. And dating doesn't need to be complicated or expensive. Get ice cream. Go for a walk. Find something happening around town. Play pickleball. Grab lunch or dinner and talk.
The point isn't to create the perfect date. The point is to spend some time with another person and find out who they are.
Give the First Date a Chance
At UT Match, we hear a lot of first-date feedback. Sometimes there is a legitimate reason someone doesn't want to go out again, and we completely understand that.
Other times we hear things like:
“We don't have enough hobbies in common.”
“He was kind of quiet.”
“She doesn't have the body type I prefer.”
Or the famous one:
“I just didn't feel an instant spark.”
It's just one date...
You are sitting across from another person who might be nervous too. You don't have to figure out whether you can spend eternity together before the check comes. Sometimes attraction grows. Sometimes someone who seems quiet on a first date is hilarious once they're comfortable. Sometimes the person who doesn't share all your hobbies ends up sharing the things that matter much more.
If you enjoyed yourself, there weren't any real red flags and you are at least a little curious about them, go out on a second date.
Stop Waiting for Someone “Better”
Another thing we see all the time in matchmaking is what we call at UT Match
“what if someone better comes along?” problem. You meet someone who is attractive, smart, kind and shares your values, but instead of wondering what could develop with that person, you start wondering if someone even better might be out there...
Maybe somebody taller.
Funnier.
Thinner.
More successful.
More athletic.
More outgoing.
More your “type.”
The problem is that there will always be another profile, another swipe or a new person that moves into your YSA ward. At some point, you have to be willing to get to know an actual person instead of comparing that person to an imaginary one.
We aren't telling anyone to settle. There is a big difference between settling and expecting perfection. Nobody is going to check every box. Figure out which boxes actually matter. Kindness matters. Character matters. Shared values matter. How someone treats you matters. Wanting similar things from marriage and family matters.
Someone Has to Go First
The conference reminded us how important it is to simply be willing to go first. We watched people volunteer in front of a room full of strangers. That took some courage. Dating takes a bit of courage. If you're interested in someone,
talk to them. Guys, ask her out. Women, talk to him. Show some interest. Give him something to work with. And yes, you can ask him out too! We sometimes make this much more complicated than it needs to be. You don't need the perfect opening line or some elaborate plan. “Hey, I'd like to take you out sometime.” That still works. They might say no. That's part of dating. It might sting for a minute, but you'll be okay.
And they might also say yes.
Don't Let a Bad Experience Become Your Dating Story
Something else from the research really caught our attention. Almost half of the young adults surveyed said
bad past relationship experiences were a barrier to dating.
That one makes sense to us. Being ghosted hurts. Getting dumped hurts. Being excited about someone and finding out they don't feel the same way hurts. But one person isn't everyone.
One breakup doesn't predict your next relationship, and one bad date doesn't mean dating is terrible.
Sometimes you have to ask yourself:
“What did I learn from this?”
Take whatever is useful from the experience and keep moving. Dating requires some resilience. You aren't going to like everyone you date, and everyone you date isn't going to choose you either. That's normal.
You are not looking for everyone. You are looking for one relationship that works.
Put Yourself Where People Can Meet You
We hope everyone who attended the conference noticed something that can be easy to forget when you're sitting at home scrolling through an app:
There are a lot of great single people out there.
Thousands of them just showed up at the Salt Palace. So keep showing up. Go to the ward activity even when you're tired. Accept the invitation. Go to the party where you only know one person. Sit somewhere different. Introduce yourself. And occasionally,
look up from your phone.
Here's a simple challenge:
Talk to Three New People.
The next time you go to church, introduce yourself to
three people you don't know.
You aren't interviewing them for marriage. You are just meeting people. That's how connections start.
Take Your Faith With You & Then Take a Step
We believe Heavenly Father is involved in our lives and in our relationships daily.
We have our own stories about how we met our husbands. Those experiences are actually part of the reason we eventually started UT Match. But having faith doesn't mean sitting still. You can pray for opportunities.
Sometimes an answer to a prayer might begin with a very ordinary conversation between two people who were willing to say hello.
Our Challenge After the Conference
At the conference, we challenged everyone to go on
one date a week for the rest of 2026. We call it the UT Match 18 Week Date Challenge. We still mean it. Not because every date is going to turn into something. Most won't, and that's okay. Go because dating teaches you how to date. You learn how to have conversations. You learn what you're attracted to. You learn which qualities really matter to you and which ones you thought mattered but actually don't. You learn how to show interest. You learn how to handle rejection. You learn how to recognize a good person when you meet one. And maybe somewhere along the way, one of those dates becomes a second date. Then a third. And maybe something neither of you expected.
Don't Let the Momentum End Here
The conference may be over, but don't let the momentum end with it...
Ask someone out.
Say yes.
Give someone a second date.
Meet somebody new.
Stop waiting for perfect.
And if you met someone at the conference you've been thinking about ever since you got home?
Reach out!
Seriously.
What are you waiting for?
